Conan O'Brien's Favorite Clip of All Time: Old Tyme Baseball

On Conan O'Brien's last NYC show Friday, he played his "favorite clip of all time", old tyme baseball from 1864:

Conan O'Brien 1864 Baseball

Breakdancing Cyborg Cops Coming to a Neighborhood Near You

This week's Random Patterns brings us two tidbits of scary future technology.

IBM has patented bionic armor "intended to bestow the wearer the power to dodge bullets." Before inserting corny Superman joke there's more, "the device works by constantly emitting electromagnetic waves that bounce off any fast-moving projectiles...If the object in question is determined to be a threat, muscle simulators activate and cause the wearer's body to contort in such way to avoid being hit."

How close to reality the technology from hell is currently unknown, but good luck sleeping knowing that IBM is hard at work turning future police and soldiers into cyborgs. You can at least cry yourself to sleep knowing cyborg police will be involuntarily breakdancing every time gangbangers do a drive-by.

And if the bionic armor somehow fails, doctors have discovered a way to heal surgical incisions with laser light. The breakthrough, said to resemble a 1970's era Rush concert minus the pot-heads, "has been studied for years, but up until now, scientists have found it impossible to find the perfect balance of heat required to coax tissue into healing itself back together." Benefits include "less scarring, faster recovery, the potential for fewer infections..." and an uncontrollable urge to listen to Aldo Nova.